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kimberleigh a holman

  • Home
  • About
    • Bio
    • Artist Statement
  • Work
    • What's on the line...
    • Common Circus
    • Contradictions + Casual Self Loathing
    • rabbit hole cycles
    • Between Words & Space
    • Clay Installation
    • Roadtrip Dances
    • Garden
    • The Last Days of Summer
    • Getting There is Half the Battle
    • Chronology of Concert Dance Works
    • Theatre | Design | Commercial
  • Press
  • Blog
  • Luminarium

Into Motion (a studio reflection)

Lying not quite on my back but more so than any other side, I can sense the nearness of the tiny dirt particles and bits of floor clinging to my clothing but not the ceiling. Diffused and minute, focus beams into the atmosphere, far beyond the studio lid, and also pressure washes the interior surface of my body.

I’m here and everywhere, all at once.

While here, present in the space between the ears and the scooped-out interior tips of the fingers, the insistent urge to move rumbles from matching pits of black hole deep in the belly and palms. Vacuum, a whirlpool draining from behind my navel, so easily folds the body in two as I’m faced with my kneecaps — the same black holes contract my hands from the most tender center spot relegating them temporarily occupied, take a moment to embrace contraction.

This curled in space might be infinite, if it wasn’t instantaneous.

On its own impulse a leg shoots out of the open-air womb, planting itself firmly onto— into if it could— the rubbery floor, propelling hips, torso, head to rapidly unfurl into much cooler air. The expanse of my wingspan driven wider by an eager collarbone and the desire for stretch. What follows is swirling, vaulting, pouncing and pause.

Site isn't floor, studio, rehearsal, but the perimeter of my sternum, the weakness of worked hamstrings, the compensation of shifting too far to one side. It is always somewhere inside my body.

tags: movement, authentic movement, performative writing, sense writing, writing, vulnerability, studio, practice, modern dance, postmodern dance, contemporary dance
categories: Writing
Wednesday 10.04.17
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Digesting the Dance Experience via Gallim Dance's W H A L E

More often than not I prefer not to define dance (if you've been to my blog this is old news). I feel a certain depth of infuriation when well-meaning patrons and peers attribute the form to the pursuit of a specific technique or subjugate the entire genre with a quantified assessment of physicality in the work. The need to define pushes audience members to focus on ‘getting it’ instead of allowing them the permission to sit back and observe, letting their senses balance and guide their path through a performance. This is not to point fingers directly at audience members, but of my experiences observing US viewing-culture, it’s perhaps not so much an individual’s bad habits as an epidemic. This rigidity enables viewers to pass judgement on their perceived success of a work based on if they can identify and classify the movement happening on stage. It’s worth noting that this distaste for parameters and qualifiers is likely due to the fact that my own work in dance tends to stray from technical display, I’m more interested in building statements from physical bodies in whatever way I find most fitting, and my own making bias and a history of viewers offering classification in response to my work certainly contributes to my opinions.

What I feel confident to state about dance is that it is ephemeral. The dance I seek out burns brightest in its brief live form— when its creators and performers realize how deep a platform they have to deliver something incredibly fleeting. This brevity makes everything high-stakes; touch and presence and embodiment are either authentic or artificial. With this statement I don’t mean to discredit artifice, which is truly an exciting tool, but I’m more enamored with the challenge of creating authenticity onstage, a delightful albeit daunting task. Successful dance has moments I can relate to and experience, certain circumstances delivered and decoded straight through the gut. These moments lend themselves to performances I fall in love with and declare war upon, my admiration and hatred coming from these visceral interpretations. The simplified version of this: dance provokes feeling.

Every now and then, aforementioned frustrations taken into consideration, I find myself so unmistakably in the presence of dance that all I can do is bask in such a moment of clarity. Gallim Dance’s W H A L E (which I attended February 11 at the Institute of Contemporary Art/Boston) provided such a brilliantly clear moment, embodying dance and constantly provoking reaction over seventy brief and captivating minutes. Risking hypocrisy with such a definitive statement, as I sat and watched the performers dive into the piece I realized that dance is getting it done, doing the work (the it, intangible, and the work, in this case, not so much the steps but the actions prompted by these extracts of life and conjectures of how love, sex, and domesticity exist in day-to-day life). The company members regardless of shape, size, strength or sex picked each other up, threw each other about the stage, ran up each other's bodies and invested themselves in the very presence of the piece— the action was all at once daily routine and lavish display. Commitment to a central line of inquiry from conceptual, physical and aesthetic perspectives all led to the success of the work as a whole.

Created by Andrea Miller and her company and collaborators, W H A L E is self-described as utilizing “radical physical language and impulsive narrative pace to juxtapose love, sex and domesticity. This piece trails the human pursuit to love and be loved, and navigates the expectations, anxiety, and forgiveness surrounding this struggle through moments of emotional vulnerability, sensual abandonment, and spiritual tribulation.” The work’s aesthetic, captured through intense and specific movement vocabulary and simple visuals, centered around the imperfect and uncomfortable, specifically vulnerability, intimacy and attraction. Miller’s movement, based in the Gaga style and influenced by her time in Ohad Naharin’s Batsheva Ensemble, is radical indeed, a perfect vehicle for the work. While Gaga as a movement language is about listening to one’s internal impulses it goes far beyond somatic pleasure, displaying as the quirkiest output of physicality, sensation, and thought— perhaps because it doesn’t adhere to a classical genre despite being performed by highly trained bodies. This absolute freedom in movement enabled the performers to share not just their brilliant physicality but glimmers of their own life experiences, impulses and instinctual reactions. Limbs moved as if they were suddenly animated by electricity, upper and lower bodies moved independently of each other in relation to the commands of the core, gestures of all sizes erupted from fingers, faces, and posture. I can’t imagine this work utilizing any other vocabulary and holding on to its ability to explore relationship to such depth.

Movement vocabulary led to various forms of partnering, and all performed physicality came directly back to experienced relationship, impressive, considering the vast and varied aspects of connection found in the work. In the first few moments of the piece, a performer ran up another performer’s body. It was such a straight forward aggression— the soles of one’s flat bare feet thudding up the surface of another’s body— and it was thrilling and reminiscent of the brutal aggressions one only has with someone that they hold incredibly close. A bit later a duet brought me to tears; Miller didn’t prescribe any sort of overt narrative here, but the performers fluctuated between such tender and vigorous treatment of each other’s bodies and trust that the moment couldn’t resist providing a sense of voyeuristic intimacy. Later, a woman ran infinite circles around a male performer only breaking her path to strike her partner again and again with body and firsts. Watching this segment transported me to earlier in the day where I was beyond frustrated with my own partner and couldn’t help the endless verbal jabs that I knew wouldn’t help the situation in the long run— here it was in physical form. Aggressive, tender, and ridiculous, every moment of partnering, duet and ensemble work reminded me of how there are some physical aspects of ourselves that only the most intimate partner will ever see. Beyond sex and physical intimacy, the obvious examples, a partner sees the ridiculous, absurd, embarrassing and silly physical successes and fails that are not often performed to one’s closest circle of family and friends. The physicality was so effective at reaching inside a viewer to point to our own stored memories that the work as a whole felt more personal an experience than a performance.

Aside from its brilliant movement, W H A L E’s visual and auditory ideas merged familiar Gallim Dance aesthetic—for example neutral lighting interspersed with vivid broad color washes, play with footlight and multi-dimensional shadow, a brilliant sound score blending percussion, pop music, live vocals and electronic sound— with the effective use of nudity and scenic design in the form of a large tarp.  Since vulnerability is a massive component of love, sex and relationship I expected it to be explored throughout the work, but I was surprised to see it not just accomplished through performance but through such aesthetic as simple plastic sheeting as the sole scenic element. The second half of the first act featured a naked man both dancing solo and amidst three clothed peers. He danced vigorously by himself across the space and throughout the milky-white slightly translucent tarp that came to life with light and almost swallowed the man up like a cloud, despite its constant plasticky rustling. In the quartet work he tried to nestle himself into the tight formations of his fellow performers, who continuously seemed to squeeze him out of the group, poignant given his bare state. His sweaty body, after such athleticism, and proximity to the other performers asked us to evaluate comfort zone, to confront that intimacy isn’t always clean and pretty. Beyond what was happening onstage, I found myself tuning in to those sitting around me; who was comfortable, who started to squirm or question where they placed their gaze? The man sitting next to me reached for his female partner’s hand. From across the room I heard a quiet giggle. The woman in front of me tensed up and didn’t know where to look. We revisited naked human bodies at the end of the second act, when each performer meditatively tumbled across the stage in various states of undress, each in an invisible lane, before quickly sprinting for clothes as they began to sing Nat King Cole’s ‘L-O-V-E’ and find space for bows. In this instance vulnerability gave way to humor, another aesthetic choice for another discussion.

While still digesting W H A L E a few days post-show, I was disappointed to read a handful of mediocre reviews in Boston-area papers, amidst what feels like a local “make art literal again” movement.  I absolutely believe each and every viewer should have a different experience, art is thrilling because of its endless varietals. The critical responses to the show, however, seemed to discredit its lack of dance and dance within developed concept which, love or hate what Gallim Dance presented, just wasn’t the case. What I extract from this viewing experience is support for my theory that the need to label and define work takes away from the viewing experience. When we throw away trepidations about what defines a genre and what the rules for the stage space are, we get work as brilliant as Gallim Dance’s W H A L E. I think those individuals that focused on unidentifiable/nontraditional movement vocabulary, verbalizing dancers, and nudity, had a far inferior viewing experience than that of those who simply took in a highly visual and articulate statement on relationship.

tags: dance, contemporary dance, modern dance, postmodern dance, whale, gallim dance, andrea miller, boston, boston dance, critical response
categories: Topics for Discussion, Reflection & Exploration
Wednesday 04.26.17
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Final Report

For anyone still curious about my Roadtrip Dances project from last August, the final report can be found at this link or by clicking the image to the right.

The report discusses my inspirations, frustrations, and general observations amidst more photos and documentation of a trip that spanned fifteen states, fifteen hundred miles, five days, and several public performances in capitols, city centers, parks, rest stops, and abandoned alleys. 

Any insight or question is welcome, as always. I hope it inspires a reader or two to inspect their surroundings and their place within.

Many thanks to Caty, for being an excellent travel companion, and also to those of you who were able to meet us along the trip for neighborhood tours, breaks, and general refreshment for our tired traveling bodies. 

 

tags: road trip, roadtrip dances, improvisation, travel, modern dance, dance everywhere
categories: Roadtrip Dances, Reflection & Exploration
Wednesday 01.11.17
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Pavlov Must've Loved a Kickline

There’s a good chance I might be the most jaded sometimes-musical-theater- choreographer in the world. While most of my time is spent exploring the depths of experimental concert dance forms, I regularly take on conventional theater jobs where I spend a few months at a time eschewing ‘jazz hands’ —outside of Fosse, god of brilliant physical weirdness— and kicklines.

(Let's pause here for a moment to say that I love all types of theater and the gigs that I get, this is mostly me not understanding the mass appeal and cultural adoption of things like "sparkle fingers"...)

Earlier this fall I was offered a ticket to a Sondheim musical and somewhere in the midst of the second act the actors geared up for, yes, a kickline, and the gentleman sitting behind me responded with a loud gasp and an immediate burst of applause in advance; not a leg had extended before he was so moved. Instead of my usual dose of snark I tried to watch with an open mind. Nine adults stood shoulder to shoulder, put their arms around each other’s backs, and kicked their legs to ninety degrees. Sure, it was fairly in sync, but honestly it wasn’t a feat that required loads of athleticism or skill, and yet by the time they had finished sixteen kicks the majority of the audience was vigorously applauding the event. Perhaps they didn’t realize that they could all be taught to do the same in less than ten minutes. (Disclaimer: Maybe not with beautifully pointed feet and straight legs, but the mechanics would be be there...)

What on earth is it about a kickline that can cause such a Pavlovian response in audience members? Is it just an extreme form of unison dancing? And then going one step further, what is about unison dancing that audiences can’t get enough of? It seems the average human is quite excited by multiple performers doing the exact same thing at the same time. I'm thinking back to one of the contemporary dance concerts I saw this fall, in addition to the musical, and as I eavesdropped on my fellow audience members I heard many compliments and comments about ‘how together’ the group was. The dancers demonstrated impressive, almost atypical physicality, and yet the audience primarily noticed that they performed in sync with one another. 

Simultaneously the least and most important research to embark on, I felt the need to find the impetus behind movement performed in unison on the contemporary stage. In the military and in marching bands, two examples of groups that utilize perfect synchronization, movement is for function and display, the body a carrier for moving across space in proximity to other bodies. In many global and social forms dances are performed in sync as a cultural tradition, everyone dances to experience the sensation of movement and for the sake of community ritual, but here there is also room for personal expression through movement. Moving to performative venues, the Rockettes and professional dance teams utilize precision unison, and I feel that the point in these forms is an amount of shock value that intrigues audiences through excess. Where my search has turned cold is why audiences that purposefully attend concert dance and theater still find some excitement with unison movement when it is likely that there is so much more meaning and infinite individual movement possibility. Why do we stop at the hypothetical kickline among transformations, relationships, physicality, and deep thought? Despite a couple hours on the internet searching for answers I’ve run dry of proven information and am left with a handful of my own guesses.

 

tags: kickline, pavlov, unison, theatre, dance, musical theatre, jazz hands, understanding, audience
categories: Topics for Discussion
Friday 12.02.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Documentation: a new duet for 2016

We were joined by the incredible Rod Harris on 10/26/16 who carefully captured some gorgeous moments, documenting one of our very last light-filled rehearsals at Studio @ 550.  The piece, featuring Katie McGrail & Katharina Schier, will debut Nov 11&12 at the Boston University Dance Theatre as part of Luminarium's Portal: Stories from the Edge. 

KK duet 1.jpg
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tags: photography, photographs, documentation, rod harris, duet, modern dance, postmodern dance, new work, exploration, experiments, ending, portal
categories: Work in Progress
Friday 10.28.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

a new duet for 2016

A few strung together journal entries in attempts to find an ending to my newest performance-based creation.

Some time around the end of spring 2016 I decided I wanted to make something based on communication.  I had a visual in my head of two active figures moving amidst a group of maybe five passive individuals that would serve to occupy space and observe, but not interact. Since August I've been working with Katie McGrail and Katharina Schier - both incredibly engaged performer/participants - to make this come to life.

As these things do, my thought has been evolving and deepening since August as the piece decides where it wants to go.

8/27/16

I’m making a piece for a November production that will be built on the idea of two dancers communicating and interacting through various movement vocabularies and physicalities. The work is currently about communication and its difficulties, as well as the management of personalities and relationship. In my thinking about authenticity, artifice and spectacle I’ve been intrigued in exploring the use of the word histrionic and its identity as a label in various contexts over time. I’m even more interested in exploring what a ‘histrionic’ movement vocabulary might look like. The work will feature two performers utilizing solo work and partner-heavy duet work in addition to an ensemble that serves mainly to watch the piece onstage since listening and observing (or lack thereof) are a huge part of communication.  -From my MFAIA Study Plan

9/31/16

In rehearsals and my own thinking I am digging into how the two active performers, Katie and Katharina, are connected. On a basic level, what would happen if the only other person that you can communicate with was someone you loathe or someone with fundamental differences of opinion? Yes, we have to work to understand each other, how far should one go? How do you act when you aren’t heard (if you act)? I’m also considering communicative ulterior motive, manipulation in communication and as a device, and fluidity in self and relationship. I communicate as the person I am at present, a different person than I was in the past, so what happens if we speed transformation up onstage and the feeling between the two individuals is allowed to evolve? I realize there is a lot here, but as I explore with the dancers I think we will isolate what’s most important to the specific statement we end up making.

Since this is a nonverbal piece, amusing since it’s about communication, instead of words I am building a language from movement and interaction. Yes, dance-makers do this in most every piece we build, but I'm treating this instance differently. It’s very important that both movement and interaction are very authentic— genuinely conceived and executed with minimal superfluous choreography.  Throughout the process I've made some material for Katie and Katharina that requires some form of decision making, be it in how they interact with each other, how they choose to physically absorb the material, or how they outwardly present the movement they possess.

Rehearsal footage demonstrates our beginning efforts to make movement that speaks. In Manipulation Sketch 1 I tried to make the movement dependent on the genuine interactions; the phrase can only really advance with the moments of touch and those instances are real reactions instead of purely choreography. Manipulation Sketch 2 lets the dancers rotate through a pattern of floor work, the dancer not completing the choreographed movement acts as a manipulator before rotating into the set movement, at which point their roles switch. The floor work is set in advance, the counterpart-reaction is purely impulse based. Solo Phrase 1 is an attempt at setting movement that speaks. It isn’t as partner dependent as the other two rehearsal videos, but I tried to give each action cause for happening and gave the dancers autonomy over delivery of the movement.

10/12/16

Last week’s rehearsal primarily consisted of discussion. I tweaked one small moment that was bugging me, and we joked that was all we were able to accomplish, but it was great to sit with Katie and Katharina and get their feelings, input and opinions about the piece and process. Ideas of importance are considering ways to keep the movement present and how we can prevent the pathways of risk taking from becoming stale or comfortable. Another concept to keep present are the idea of the observers joining them on stage, what does that entail and ultimately mean. The themes of surveillance, observation, and power mentioned in group study are intriguing, as are the noted moments of resonance (such as the chin tap) in comparison to their physical experiences. We danced the work one more time to cap off the rehearsal and I feel like it gained both a new dimension with additional understanding and also a sense of clarity.

The first six minutes of this piece have presented a consistent feeling through struggles with power dynamic, all considerations of relationship and tempo and I feel that it’s due for a shift. Compositionally I feel that Katharina has been pushed a lot in the beginning segment of the work and her presence needs to change. I feel a sort of defeat coming for her, a withering up of sorts, so that Katie can discover that there’s no interaction or communication without someone on the other end. Perhaps stripping some of the communication back to find vulnerability before building back into a duet will be the direction I go.

tags: new work, modern dance, postmodern dance, dance theatre, process, exploration, experiments, luminarium dance, luminarium, duet
categories: Work in Progress
Thursday 10.27.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Live Free or Die (8)

Preparing like an Olympic diver in New Hampshire dusk, really just squaring my toes to an invisible line in the grass. The grass is anything but lush, clunky sandy anthills spanning the distance between brittle stalks of formerly-green blades - it’s even sharper at the bottom. I fill my lungs, feeling foolish and amused as Russell stands all-too-close, recording with one of our phones. Observations before I depart, despite and in accordance with my attempts to be present: my mom standing in a golden-lit window, unaware and accepting of my strange backyard actions while washing dishes from the hissing faucet before dinner, the familiar pace of my dad’s dense footsteps before the creak of the basement door hinges. All of it is familiar; being ridiculous in the backyard with my now-husband, the noises created by my parents, an infrequent bark in the distance, the slope of the hill.

Lowering my body towards the ground, letting body weight take over, forcefully rolling down what used to look like a mountain. I’m aware of the edges of my body, the outsides of my arms striking the dirt over and over again, just like the small tidal wave my sister created when she burst our small pool in the mid-90s. Rolling out of my tumble at the bottom of the hill, parts of my body still pounding from the inside out, I walk out of the performance, smooth dust from my dress, and join everyone for dinner.

View full video here. 

A small slice of New Hampshire movement exploration as I try to finish up #roadtripdances for now (MA & RI I'm still coming for ya). While not so much a public site I explored lots of physicality and rolling on this hill as a younger human (mainly because it's in my childhood home backyard). Haven't rolled down it in about 15 years and it felt great. 📸: @russellholman who held all his giggling til the end. What a pro. #roadtrip #newhampshire #hill #tumble #roll #jillcametumblingafter #trees #didntrollintothebrook #velocity #childhoodmemories #dance #danceeverywhere

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 11 likes

tags: dance, roadtrip, roadtrip dances, road trip, new hampshire, hill, exploration, outside, thinking about dance
categories: Roadtrip Dances, Road Trip, Bits of life
Monday 10.24.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Things I know/Things I'm not entitled to know but I know anyways

Midnight on a Friday and I'm staring into a tiny ceramic dish in the kitchen holding three bobbypins, two quarters, a nickel, some incidental coffee grounds and a screw. I'm sure everyone has a vessel like this, and I can't remember the last time I wore the bobbypins. To my left is a letter that's not addressed to me, the magnetic pull is strong. My focus on the dish is belittled by my side eye on the letter, but to be honest I've already read it. 

How exhilarating it is to be a validated fly on the wall. Being mute but also unasked, all the while knowing the ending to the chapter or story in your bones. If I was a better writer I could've taken a close compositional guess at this letter years ago, but instead it's been lurking in the back of my brain, every now and then drifting into the present for contemplation. The time hadn't been right. 

I'm building a new duet where my primary twosome maintains gripping communication with each other while they are surrounded by observing bodies that don't get to engage, and I'm fairly sure this would be a moment akin to one of my silent observers. I've been struggling with the presence and tasks of the observers as their task is just to be present, making a sort of internal captain's log of their experience. This is the most difficult part as a creator of performance: importing enough sensation, cause and effect from this exact point in time into the work so that maybe my performers can find it, and maybe just maybe the audience members can pick up on the magic that's happening live. It's impossible to bottle experience, but perhaps possible to rediscover.  

In other thoughts, how great would it be to be a professional fly on the wall?

tags: composition, observation, Making work, Fly on the wall, Rambling, Duet, Words, Dance, latenight, observations, Validation
categories: Bits of life, Reflection & Exploration
Saturday 10.01.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
Comments: 2
 

Roadtrip Dances: Smaller States, Faster Travel (7)

Monday, August 15

I underestimated the magnetic pull of familiarity and home on this last day of the car, as the desire to reach our destination swelled. Driving from Philadelphia through New Jersey, New York and Connecticut to reach Massachusetts was a drive I have done many times and the visual cues and mile markers seemed to push onwards instead of stimulating interest and a stop. I do feel that I did a bit of a disservice to my home area comfort zone, but at this time my brain was also incredibly saturated, swimming with thought from the Southern leg of my trip. The view from the inside of the car was familiar and didn't vary much, the same green deciduous trees lining highways with occasional and quick pockets of city. While this was a point of stress in Florida, when the landscape was straight and open, I felt snugly held by the leafy trees even if the scenery wasn't novel. 

During the last leg of the trip I focused on simple public performance, leaving myself open to observe any reactions. I completed a car dance while crossing the George Washington bridge (NY), and a dance based on observation of people encountered at a highway rest stop in New Jersey. Connecticut was especially rough as we got closer and closer to home, and I improvised on my impatience in a strip mall parking lot. There were a lot of people walking about at the rest stop and several individuals made eye contact but all kept walking. I wonder if they feel like the performance wasn’t for them, and that they couldn’t stop to watch (minus one unfortunate male cat-caller), or if that they were just feeling the same sort of homewards travel magnetism.  While affixing my head to the car and spinning about in the Connecticut parking lot, two older women were taken aback but not enough to linger. Perhaps that's a common occurrence in Connecticut.

View NY/NJ performance video here.  View Connecticut performance video here.

Excerpt from NJ/NY. Included some fiddling around before officially starting so I could share the really appreciative whistler-slash-#1 fan of impromptu art. Clip features some apathy, rest stop mentality, having to keep going, a slow mo tantrum I saw inside. Several drivers/pedestrians behind the camera looked while passing by, unlike the Florida rest stop. Grass was surprisingly clean. #newjersery #newyork #reststop #roadtrip #roadtripdances #travel #dance #danceeverywhere #grass #oilchange

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 18 likes

Showing signs of desperation and car confinement in a tiny excerpt from a CT strip mall. Two older women in a car behind us pretended not to notice but were very confused. #timetogohome #roadtrip #roadtripdances #connecticut #highway #parkinglot #rotate #carduet #stuck #stripmall

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 14 likes

tags: roadtrip dances, road trip, research, observation, improvisation, new jersey, new york, connecticut, massachusetts, home
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Wednesday 09.21.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Philadelphia (6)

Sunday, August 14-Monday, August 15

We got into Philadelphia late on Sunday night and had to leave fairly early on Monday morning, unfortunate, as I really like the city, but it also proved to be an excellent break after a difficult weekend.

After catching up with an old friend late into Sunday night, we woke up Monday morning to walk the city at the beginning of rush hour - strategic for encountering a lot of people, no? 

Philadelphia feels a lot like Boston, to me, in terms of its buildings, rush and history. It’s a grey city instead of a tan city, and even though I’ve only visited a few times it feels familiar. Perhaps spurred on by the good feelings of a visit with a dear friend, or the comfort of the home-like feel, I had the highest hopes for the most viewed public performance of the trip. This is where I would focus on the idea of performance, of being viewed, or so I thought. Situating myself right in the middle of Penn Square, against City Hall, the LOVE sculpture, public transportation, and the major rush of adults getting to work on time I began to move inspired by tall buildings, public spaces, the calm I felt within the bustle of a city. My audience strategy failed. Humorously no one that walked by batted an eyelid, and the experience began to circle comedy. At one point a woman passed in such close proximity that we could have made physical contact, but her resolve to stay focused on some spot on the distance was incredible. This sort of thing continued as I kept moving and even when I started to push my focus outwards as I moved, attempting eye contact, groups of people just a foot or two away seemed to not even notice my presence. Two men working in some sort of tourist booth did cheer me on from afar, perhaps because that's where they had to be and it was a break from the mundane? Thanks to them, however, as I truly started to think I'd mastered invisibility and they swiftly brought me back down to earth. 

As I continue thinking about the Philadelphia experience I would love to know if the majority of individuals actually noticed and just didn’t acknowledge what I was up to, or if passersby truly didn’t see it. Is there enough rogue art in Philly that it was the norm, or did it make people uncomfortable? Would sound have changed the response? Does context change anything; if I had performed during the Fringe Festival would that be more acceptable or classifiable to those walking by? Am I overthinking everything and people just don't really care that I'm atypically moving my body in public spaces? 

I left amused and satisfied. Someday I’ll get to do the Rocky steps.

View video from Philadelphia here. 

Excerpt from Philly, in which caffeine-free-me has a hard time making things happen at 8:30am. Playing with the height and established feel of such a city and the idea of finding just a tiny bit of wide open space. Really wanted to dance in the spontaneously spraying fountains in back but that would make for a wet car trip. Not sure who viewed this... No one commuting to work seemed to notice. Several curious homeless people and one homeless dog were stationed behind me far to my left, and two guys in some sort of tourist info booth were pumped and quite into it - thanks to them. (Some funny captured sound in this if you can deal with it.) #roadtripdances #roadtrip #improv #dance #danceeverywhere #lowkey #spiral #roll #philadelphia #philly #city #rushhour #goodmorning

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 25 likes

tags: roadtrip dances, road trip, dance, research, observation, improvisation, philadelphia, pennsylvania
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Thursday 09.15.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
Comments: 1
 

Roadtrip Dances: Virginia and Maryland (5)

Sunday, August 14

We left Durham early on the morning of Sunday, August 14 as there were many stops to make en route to Philadelphia. Our first stop was Richmond, it was directly on our path, the capital of the state, and neither my companion or myself had been there, but yet again we encountered a ghost town. The vacancy of Richmond was probably exacerbated by temperatures in the high nineties, but also by the day being a Sunday, something I didn’t consider in advance even after the influx of religious billboards. We drove about, taking in the hot, dusty tan and taupe city, everything looking a bit run down and tired. Signage and fonts from decades past, lots of boarded up windows, very little noise and a hot breeze. I found a wide open intersection with large sidewalks for a performance and yet again performed to those who drove by and those who had to be out in the heat - a handful of homeless men.

To be completely candid, the rest of the Virginia experience was infuriating. I’m sure the state has some beautiful places and redeeming qualities, but my travel through didn’t encounter additional reasons to stop before it was necessary. After the failed stop in Richmond and finding ourselves almost out of gas we found an exit with a gas station and a myriad of fast food restaurants which were the apparent only option for sustenance on a Sunday. We decided a Subway was the best choice of the limited options, though I did conjure up a memory of a dance friend foraging on a performance trip, and as we entered the store we walked right into an intense fight over a dog trapped in a hot car, the dog’s family thinking nothing of their decision. The ignorance demonstrated in the back and forth argument was shocking. Mad for the poor dog (sadly there’s no law in Virginia protecting dogs locked in hot cars or I would've gone vigilante), mad about the ridiculous amount of propaganda splashed on anti-abortion billboards and hateful bumper stickers escorting us up the highway, it took me the entirety of a couple of hours of bumper to bumper traffic to cool down. Then we hit Baltimore.

Baltimore was the first location that made me realize how we were not just traveling through deserted Southeastern cities, but also across a sort of road map of the country’s major recent civil rights events. Thinking about the recent drop of charges in the Freddie Gray trial and trying to put that in the context of the city we were driving and walking through, my brain couldn’t really process much else of what I saw. At surface value I noticed a good amount of brick, taller buildings than previous cities, and lots of praise for the military. I still have some trivial curiosity regarding the popularity of crabs and wonder if anyone in the impoverished neighborhood that also houses Johns Hopkins Hospital could afford to go there. We spotted City Hall, a most ornate building, with green space and a series of fountains in front, two hidden parking spots, mostly abandoned on a Sunday afternoon besides a dozen or so homeless men sleeping on benches. I performed amidst the gardens and fountains, vacant city hall, many sleeping men. I’m not sure if anyone opened their eyes to take it in. I’m not sure if there would be any benefit to viewing what I did. It was just important to do, entering and leaving very quietly. We found a battered dead butterfly stuck in the windshield wiper of the car, adding to the somber feel of the afternoon.

It took getting to northern Maryland to sense the familiarity of the North just around the corner (down the highway), as the trees, highway structures and signage started feeling somewhat familiar. The Mason-Dixon line was palpable; I had several friends try to humorously suggest the shift would be obvious and I didn’t realize this would be somewhat true. When you travel around with an educator, she can tell you who even the obscure figures being commemorated through names of highways and historical sites are, leading to the realization that there are major differences in picking southern and northern important figures for such commemoration.

I can’t help but feel I should go back and find more positive experiences and beautiful sites, it feels like irresponsible reporting of the Southern East coast, but for now I think I need some time.

Richmond, Virginia video click here. Baltimore, Maryland video click here. 

Tiny excerpt from Richmond, VA. Literally no humans anywhere, except those that passed in cars, maybe because it was about 100 degrees. Heat + human confusion + lack of morale = a really lazy, smeary dance for an intersection. Could've been a hallucination but I think the fellow driving the flatbed was smiling... #roadtripdances #roadtrip #richmond #virginia #city #sidewalk #hot #dance #danceeverywhere #whereiseveryone

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 16 likes

Baltimore, MD felt a little somber more than anything at first. This is a tiny clip from a walking sketch. Couldn't resist the light and shadow and built in balance beam. #roadtripdances #roadtrip #notagymnast #walking #light #shadow #baltimore #maryland #dance #danceeverywhere 📸: @caitfay87

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 12 likes

tags: roadtrip dances, road trip, dance, modern dance, improvisation, research, observation, virginia, maryland
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Thursday 09.08.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: From One Carolina to Another (4)

Saturday, August 13

We left Charleston after a final explore on Saturday, August 13 and started our drive to Durham, North Carolina. The drive was a reasonable five hours, at least in comparison to the day before, and accompanied by nearly 70 wacky and fairly insensitive billboards for an aging tourist attraction called ‘Pedro’s South of the Border’ as we progressed up the highway. Billboards advertising pralines and canned goods, okra, mainly, started tapering off as we entered the northern of the Carolinas. While Durham was brand new to me, a friend and fellow MFA candidate had been singing its praises since they day we met (shout out to Amy Unell who also provided an unbelievably comprehensive list of Durham attributes and took us on a killer tour of Duke the next morning), and I was excited to see what we could fit into a condensed stop. 

Happy to be out of the car by late afternoon we walked for hours by indulging our curiosity all over the city, trying to make some sense of the layout and mostly failing. Durham sprawls, it is wide open, there is a lot of diversity in building heights, minimal signage, and what isn’t brick is very light stone.  It’s an excellent city for getting lost and the experiences that come from wandering without purpose; at one point we walked into a cupcake shop's birthday party and were welcomed to stay (southern hospitality is definitely a thing). Yet again it was incredibly hot outside, temperatures were in the high nineties with no sign of breeze, and the only signs of city life were a long line snaking down the block outside an ice cream shop that didn’t pop up until after dark, a trickle of individuals headed into a Lyle Lovett concert at Durham Performing Arts Center and the distant roar of a large group of people at a minor league Durham Bulls baseball game. Perhaps that’s where everyone was.

I had several thoughts wander through my head as we traveled and took in our surroundings. In efforts to understand the prevalence of bulls everywhere we stumbled upon the history of old tobacco and wandered through the converted tobacco buildings. I am torn with how intrigued I was with the old brick buildings and compounds, despite their origin in the needs of a terrible industry, but their history was alive and I couldn't help but feel a sort of attraction to the old brick buildings. Towards the end of the evening we were approached by a homeless man in a three piece suit and hat asking for money. I was taken by surprise both by his level of dress and the amount of clothing in relation to the extreme heat, but remembered that the man we encountered in Charleston asking for money was also fairly formally dressed. I’m very curious about this trend, but didn’t feel that it was my place to ask about his attire out of the blue. The next morning, after some incredible avocado toast that deserves special mention, Amy and her pup Luna drove us around Duke. As we saw some of the more iconic sites of the University, the Duke chapel among other landmarks, I wondered about the aesthetic and function of the college town. It felt so much like Amherst in a Southern way, perhaps there's a secret formula for developing such towns. Additionally, Durham felt fairly liberal and I know a lot of fantastic open-minded individuals that live or lived in North Carolina. How do such small liberal pockets easily exist in a state that can otherwise pass such atrocities as HB2 (the bathroom bill)? I collected these thoughts, questions and observations, unable to dive in to any of them with brain that was rapidly becoming saturated, and hope to revisit them as I continue breaking down my travels.

Durham was where I had one of my most meaningful connections and performance experiences of the entire trip. Amidst our long walk all over the city we found a mural in an empty lot. Sitting across the lot, staring into the mural, was a man in ripped, dirty clothing, speaking to himself, who identified himself as homeless. I was interested in the swoopy simple lines on the mural as a sort of dance language, and asked if it would be ok if I filmed a quick dance at the site. As I performed movement that was awkward and clunky as I tried to move in heat and sandals on gravel, he sat rapt by my improvisation. Upon finishing he enthusiastically expressed how much he enjoyed the impromptu performance. I was excited by the fact that perhaps I enhanced someone’s day-to-day experience with my project. This felt like progress, despite not having specifically defined sub-goals to accomplish during the trip. 

For video click here.

Adding some invisible ink to this Durham, NC mural with its hand-sized line drawings. Isolation, getting stuck, dead ends, swirl. Our friend at the very end wouldn't give his name, but was down with being part of the video and viewing experience and expressed excitement, intrigue and a little confusion afterwards. #roadtripdances #roadtrip #durham #northcarolina #mural #improv #invisibleink #dance #danceeverywhere #streetart #literally

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 24 likes

tags: roadtrip dances, modern dance, improvisation, observations, dance, north carolina, research, experiments, durham, road trip
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Tuesday 09.06.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Charleston, South Carolina (3)

Friday, August 12-Saturday, August 13

At about 8pm on Friday night I found myself processing the day by standing on my tiptoes in the middle of a swimming pool at the back of a parking lot in Charleston, my face at the level of pedestrians’ feet as they walked down the cobblestoned sidewalks. For the first twenty minutes of precarious balance I was accompanied by a man with a cigar; we didn’t make eye contact, a sort of performance in itself. As durational things often are, there was something soothing and meditative about standing on my toes in neck-deep water and slowly swirling my arms back and forth in the water to maintain balance, letting my mind wander. At least it was until a gang of bats came out and started dive bombing the surface of the water, ending my solitude and thinking.

Charleston is a beautiful city, it looks almost as if Boston’s Beacon Hill neighborhood uprooted itself and went on a tropical vacation - Federal-style architecture amidst palm trees and sweltering heat. Sweltering heat, I'm assuming, led to the lack of other people in Charleston which was quite strange. In what seemed like it would be a fairly touristy area (my travel companion Caty had been there before and reported packed streets) we saw just a trickle of human life. This did make it a great evening for exploring as we picked a nearby deserted street at random and walked it until it ended, at that point choosing the next street. Wandering at its best, accompanied by the incessant chirping of cicadas. I found my body easily adapting to the slow pace of the city, perhaps it was the humid heat in the high nineties. Shedding my sidewalk-racer inner Bostonian reminded me of the time I took an hour to walk down a street in seacoast Maine, heightening my ability to actually see, but in Charleston I saw sneaky messages inscribed in a smooth-barked tree, a hidden cemetery, locals sizing up tourists before manners provoked a smile, and tons of iron work. I wonder if the multitude of ornate iron gates and shutters on townhouse windows played into the sense of modesty I felt - women I passed on the street, while stylishly dressed, were quite covered up for extreme heat - or the idea of keeping others out.

The next morning, Saturday August 13, I performed in Washington Square. The park is frequented by regular tour groups, I felt that I had a chance for my tiny performance to be observed in this vacant city, and also it was inspiringly filled with gorgeous live oak trees, moss breathily dangling from branches. It was a fun performance for me but oddly everyone that stopped by as part of the tour seemed to look away, as if Southern manners provided me a bit of modesty for my strange park outburst. One very well-dressed homeless man lingered, perhaps he watched my movement exploration.

What left me unsettled about Charleston was that it felt like going to Oz. Inside its historic perimeter is a lot of beauty, calm and Southern sweetness, but it felt somewhat like a facade. We visited in the middle of Charleston Pride, and neither saw or heard a single sign that Pride was underway until encountering two decorated twenty-somethings in a Starbucks as an older man heckled their efforts. I’ve never been to the South and the blatant differences in Civil War and civil rights viewpoints from my education, and Northern upbringing definitely made for some culture shock. In Charleston I performed in a park situated near a slave market-turned-museum, and we walked past the site where a maniac tried to start a race war by shooting nine people in a church just last year. A short amount of time after we drove out of the well-off city we were looking at serious poverty, sites of education crises (not to mention the occasional Confederate flag which, history and free speech aside, is nauseating to look at). Income inequity obviously exists in the North, it runs rampant in the Boston area, but maybe it takes seeing something elsewhere to be fully aware of it or to take action in the place you call home. 

Taking these glimpses of a new part of America into my thoughts and sitting with the discontent, while also recognizing the great exploration, food and scenery and simmering on my performance experience, I spent the majority of the drive to Durham, North Carolina with a very full brain. 

For video click here. 

Excerpt from a distraction-packed convo with GWashington on the topic of gorgeous Spanish moss hanging in the live oak trees. (Hair plays the role of moss.) Partially viewed by three meandering tour groups, a homeless man, a couple of passing tired horses pulling tourists... fully viewed by the filming @caitfay87 ! #roadtripdances #roadtrip #charleston #southcarolina #dance #danceeverywhere #georgewashington #greenery #liveoak #trees #tourists #improv

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 21 likes

 

tags: roadtrip dances, roadtrip, dance, modern dance, performance, performing, south carolina, charleston, wandering
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Friday 09.02.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Florida and on to Georgia (2)

After the airport dance and a far too brief overnight stay with a pair of my alternate parents (thanks, Audrey & Paul), my traveling companion Caty and I hit the road at 7am with the intention of covering Florida and Georgia before stopping in Charleston, SC. I say intention because we didn't even make it out of the driveway before needing to jumpstart the car and charge the battery a bit. We ignored the potential bad omen. Eventually we got our act together, hopped in the car full of Caty's classroom supplies and my miscellaneous collection of things that seemed important to take on an art road trip, and found the highway.

Our first day on the road was a disguised exercise in mindfulness. All of my pre-trip fears about the worst part of long-distance car travel being sitting and confinement were somewhat validated but also the experience wasn't quite as torturous as I'd anticipated. Nine hours of Florida and Georgia highway was a considerable amount of sitting and monotony. We didn’t stop for the first few hours which consisted of mile after mile of the thin grey line that is the Floridian highway system. I know many parts of my reflection on the trip will appear to be generalization, and I do have memories from some beautiful beaches in Florida and family theme park extravaganzas, trips that made me realize not all of America is arctic in winter months, but Florida highways are incredibly uninspiring. I spent the first hour of the drive trying to hold on to some of the novelty of the landscape; imagine roads that are simply straight, no curves or changes in elevation for as long as you can drive with a border of trees on either side obstructing the possibility of a view. It was amusing, as lack of curve and elevation might be to a New Englander, but amusement quickly turned into a sense of doom when the horizon just didn’t change. I had a notebook at the ready to record my findings but I simply ended up repetitively affirming my intrigue in palm trees, the superior cloud formations in the sky, the fact that trash is made into mountains, and a recurring billboard for divorcemenonly.com. Also the prevalence of truck drivers and the general impatience of our neighboring vehicles.

I completed my first dance at a rest stop because it was simultaneously something new, respite, but it was also set directly off the same rigid path we were fated to endlessly follow. Like ourselves, everyone at the utilitarian rest stop looked tired, bored and sticky. I took interest in a random grove of five palm trees, definitely not natural to the ground they were rooted in, growing upwards with the same straightness as the road, and made a movement sketch to match. No one really seemed to watch or care and at that stage that was ok with me. We ventured on, past many more of the aforementioned divorcemenonly.com billboards, enduring a continuation of the grade school lesson in perspective as the straight highway shrunk into the distance. There were tall buildings in Jacksonville, an exciting shift in environment that quickly flattened back out to our day’s norm. There wasn’t much change at the Georgia border, besides the proud declaration of PEACHES! and PECANS! every time we would hit the mile marker, the introduction of something called Huddle House, and an influx of churches. There wasn’t enough time to do justice to Georgia, besides some in-car miniature movement sketches likely observed by no one. Sorry, Georgia. The South Carolina border was an exciting milestone, but also one where our surroundings felt decidedly southern. A long day.

For video click here. 

An excerpt from a Florida rest stop dance... After you pass beachy So. FL things get really linear, flat, straight for about a billion miles. No elevation, no curves, not much to see off the highway. 🙀 The people at the rest stop directly to the left of the screen were mostly not amused by my moves, even though I'd expect they'd never seen some nut making a dance for the straight/boringness of the Floridian highway and the rigidity of palm trees. #basic #palmtrees #highway #reststop #roadtrip #sorrynotsorry #blueskies #flat #boring #florida #dancelife #danceeverywhere #roadtripdances

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 21 likes

tags: roadtrip dances, road trip, florida, georgia, improv, improvisation, performing, performance, mindfulness, highway
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Wednesday 08.31.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Roadtrip Dances: Why and a False Start (1)

There were many reasons why I decided to take on a series of road trip dances up the East coast beyond the fact that I needed a practicum project for grad school and that a close friend needed to get her car up to Boston. There is so much of this country that I haven't observed with my own eyes and as a US-based artist making work that speaks to our culture I felt this was important. As a human being, too, art-aside if one can separate, I wanted to have a chance to examine the coast I live on; how do various aspects of the South compare to my lovely little pocket of the Northeast, would I feel a distinct shift in attitude, behaviors, reception, architecture - hell - fast food chains? Being quite curious about the consumption of art and the various shades of willingness to participate I wondered who would stop to view my tiny performances and how would they view and possibly engage.  Finally, I struggle with the idea of myself as a performing body. I love to dance and to explore my physicality, constantly am immersed in making work to set on others, enjoy the discreetly performative act of teaching, and yet I have only recently passed the point of 'hating' the act of performance. Could I complete a project based on the caveat that I had to publicly demonstrate something I haven't quite figured out?

Slightly anxious about the latter reason, having arrived in Southern Florida, I found it difficult to let go of the marginal amount of stress surrounding the performative goals I had set for myself. Funny, because there was no pressure to 'make something' - not that that's ever really a stressor - I'd decided to move in an improvisational and perhaps site-influenced manner. It was the act of being watched with no safety net of others around me; if there was any sort of audience it would be a deliberate audience, choosing to watch yours truly as likely the only person doing strange things in public at the time.

Considering the fact that people probably watch me do very weird things every day (I've got a number of odd habits and methods and tendencies), I gave in a bit, giving myself permission to do just one invisible dance while sitting in the airport waiting for a ride. An excerpt of it is below. I was passed by a family, an airport worker driving a woman through the terminal, a flight crew, and a horde of businesspeople and no one was wise to what I was doing. The fact that it was a secret was exciting. While this was completely not the purpose of my trip, a false start of sorts, it gave me just enough momentum and amusement to combat my silly worries and carry on with the project.

Also, while not opposed to nudity in performance, a copious application of spandex (aka bike shorts) was adhered to in each of these videos. Dance is just crotchy. Get over it. 

For video click here. 

Excerpt from an attempt at a completely anonymous/invisible/overlookable (even headless) performance at an airport in Florida, pre road-trip, exactly one week ago. Also, don't worry: bike shorts. Also-also, excuse my lumpy knees. This was me allowing myself not to be seen in front of random people before an entire trip of busting a move in public. #airport #danceeverywhere #invisible #anonymous #headless #roadtrip #hands #shhh #backgroundnoise #comfortzone #dancelife #roadtripdances

See this Instagram video by @kholman * 16 likes

tags: dance, airport, improv, improvisation, road trip, roadtrip dances, knees, invisible, performing
categories: Roadtrip Dances
Wednesday 08.24.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Road trip waiting

30 minutes left to wait to get on a flight to Philly, sit for an hour and a half, scramble to another terminal to catch a back to back connecting flight, to sit again for three hours.  I already got the deluxe TSA pat down (perils of a one way ticket), stared angrily at the tiny airport Starbucks for a bit (reflux-gate day 5, past the withdrawals and now just feeling snarky about caffeine), and settled on an overpriced and really unsatisfying bottle of airport water.  That was all thirty minutes ago. I'm currently most aware of the amount of sitting such a trip will take, and that's making my fidgety self just a bit nervous. Waiting. Perhaps this project has also just revealed itself as an exercise in patience. 

 

The problem is I'm so not in sync with my mindful self at present. Will Russell remember to tell J&C (who are watching Twyla today) to feed our dog breakfast? Will he remember to give them the bunch of kale I snipped from the garden at 5:30 this morning? What if I miss my connector? How ever will life go on without me for four days at home in an extreme heatwave??!! Spoiler alert, all of these things will be fine and I know that. Let's blame my lack of zen on my lack of coffee, that makes sense.

 

People watching for meditation. A tired looking mom and dad walking back and forth telling a wired toddler to "use her words." An older man talking to everyone, he hasn't been on a plane in 40 years and is proud to share he's going to visit his kids. A really young mom with a baby strapped on her loudly preplanning her first plane ride experience and making an epic iPhone movie. A young woman wearing a winter parka, shopping on her laptop for parkas. Lots of business people. A pair of women flipping through their selfies for quality assurance. An older couple also people-watching, we made silent eye contact. People with headphones, books, newspapers phones, drinks, really weird breakfast choices (pickle flavored chips). The majority of men have tucked their shirts in, very few women have done the same. The woman in the parka has removed her jacket and ceased shopping for parkas.

 

8 more minutes to go. 

tags: Road trip, Waiting, Worry, Travel, Impatient, People watching, Airport
categories: Bits of life, Road Trip
Thursday 08.11.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Garden: an exploration into video

As a professional artist-turned-grad-student I've realized that a huge part of my practice is finding the balance between ability, passion, and permission in creative work. Knowing your strengths and weaknesses is equally important to taking risks, taking on challenge, and letting excitement lead the way. Another post for another day. 

I recently took on a passion project when Mali Sastri (Jaggery) bestowed upon me the honor of making a music video for the band's gorgeous song Garden. While I hadn't previously worked on video, excepting a small amount of commercial work, I had wanted to for some time... especially growing up as a music video junkie.  I didn't originally intend on editing the piece myself, but as I immersed in the project there was a sort of beauty in the consistency of allowing my vision to organically take control of each aspect as I learned about the piece as a whole and what it needed to say. I'm beyond grateful to have so many wonderfully understanding producers in my life, this time Mali, that allow me to work fairly autonomously and fully trust my process, and enhancing my practice by discovering the power and use of dance for camera has been incredible.

This wasn't meant to be a post about process, so excuse the jump in flow. I recently rediscovered the pages in my notebook (below) with some very early and rough Garden sketches. One of my many methods in musing on new work is to have a seriously meditative drawing session. I'm by no means a visual artist and a rarely share my sketches as I wouldn't want them misinterpreted as product when they're simply part of my process, but this time around I can't help it. Below are the pages I sketched across while listening to the song on repeat. Further below is a gallery with film stills from the footage I shot, seriously representative of the sketches! What makes this exciting to me is that I didn't look back at the sketches after my initial session of doodling imagery, my fairly regular process. There was at least a month between drawing and filming, another chunk of time between extracting footage from the camera and starting to organize and edit, and yet there are so many consistencies in the images from my notebook and the film stills. Cool! (Or maybe I'm just geeking out...)

Above, sketches from early in the process. Below, an assortment of similar film stills. Consistency!

Above, sketches from early in the process. Below, an assortment of similar film stills. Consistency!

screenshot 2 (1).jpg screenshot 15.jpg screenshot 23.jpg screenshot 3.jpg screenshot 14.jpg screenshot 13.jpg

I might be the only individual that's taken by the similarity in this bank of images, I think because it's rare for me to not have a thought continuously morph and evolve as I create. Sure, while creating the movement I learned more about what the piece needed to be, and sure, while filming and editing more of the subtle story began to dictate itself, but my original bank of imagery held up throughout. I think this song, or my relationship to it and interpretation of it, has been clearly understood from the start. 

The best news? The video premieres tomorrow! Join us at OBERON for Jaggery's Org: Black and White Ball at 8pm in Harvard Square for live performances, incredible music, and of course the Garden video debut. 

Photos and video feature Luminarium's Jessica Chang, Melenie Diarbekirian, Katie McGrail, Merli V. Guerra and Alison McHorney. 

tags: dance, video, dance for camera, boston, jaggery, music video, sketches, sketch, notes, notebook, images, imagery, opportunity
categories: Reflection & Exploration
Thursday 07.28.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

a birthday thought jumble

11:59pm and I'm sitting in my sun chair looking at the moon, kind of annoyed at myself that I didn't turn off the porch light because the backlighting is making for slightly sub-par night sky viewing but I want to be in my chair at midnight to ring in 29. (Russell must've put a new bright bulb in the lamp, I don't remember it being this bright.) At 11pm I decided I wanted to cross something off my to-do list before the new year and finally put the ancient Alice in Wonderland book pages in the frames I purchased this week. (Not super nice frames because they're expensive, but good enough I think.) I still need another frame. At 11:51 I determined I could spend the last few minutes of year 28 being strong and busy, so I carried all of our weights upstairs in advance of tomorrow's party. First the 15lb pair as they're our mid-size option, then the 25lb pair which started out easy until I couldn't fit my hand between the weight rack and the wall and forgot I could put down the weight in my other hand, then the easy 8lb pair and delivered my worn copy of A Director Prepares to my office bookshelf. The third floor thermostat clock said 12:00 but I knew it was early so I sassily glanced at my cell phone which declared it to be only 11:56 and headed outside. Here I am. (It's actually 12:09 now since I've been writing this.)

 

I'm really happy with right now. A simple descriptor, but it works.  I'm happy with the work that I make, happy with how I treat other people and myself, happy with the relationships in my life, happy with who I've come to be at present. As a twenty-something female I can sit here and acknowledge the amount of time I've spent trying on different identities, making some poor and/or laughable choices, and wasting time deserting myself, especially in my teenage years. Somewhere between then and now, closer to this side of the scale, I realized I don't have to try anymore and that I really like me... However awkward and ridiculous and awful (creative?) at punctuation that I care to be. I'm very lucky to have 'happy' in my life in this too often disgusting, unbelievably warped world we are all living in at present. 

 

Another unraveling birthday tangent... I'm 29 and I feel just accomplished enough. Incredibly motivated and eager to keep forging onwards for the next several decades, but not displeased or resentful of past choices. Nope, I haven't been awarded a MacArthur genius grant as a 20 year old dance wizard or anything of the sort, but I excitedly know what I'm about to start making right now, in the land of new art, and I have so many individuals in my life that trust me to make work for them that I constantly get to rediscover such gratitude. My work ruminates on observations of my immediate world, which allows me to process and self-improve and hopefully to set a pattern and a precedent that might reach a few other people. I get to do what I want, professionally for myself and for others, I also get to study what I want and constantly learn. Cool.

 

Wrapping this thought spew up because I refuse to use conventional bug-spray and I think the mosquitos found me. Also I heard a rustling in the privet hedge and skunks and opossums come out in the city at night; I'd like to have a skunk-scent and rabies-free birthday celebration. Also-also I want to go admire my framed Alice and read a decidedly un-academic gruesome detective novel in bed until I'm too scared to fall asleep but I fall asleep anyways. I hope this is always adulthood. See ya, 28.

 

tags: Thinking, Thoughts, Happy, Birthday, Tangent
categories: Bits of life
Saturday 07.16.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 

Dancing in public, the Kardashians, late night discontent

True confession.

I am writing a progress report for grad school (yes, at 1am a few days before its due date - I have a hard time tearing myself away from the actual work and studies to actually document my learning), and I'm watching my first ever episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians. I deserve every cringe and nose wrinkle that might've just rippled across your face. To be fair, I need background noise to write and if I turn on something interesting I'll watch or listen to it instead of working. 

Anyways.

The point of this admission is that I tuned in for a split second while grabbing tea, when two of them were discussing an upcoming appearance on Ellen DeGeneres' talk show and the fact that they might have to dance as they entered the show. They were downright mortified by the idea of having to dance. Mortified! Dancing is something the human race/human body has known how to do since before we were homo sapiens (don't fact check my late night rants), and here are these uber-privileged millionaire broads with every resource in the world at their fingertips... too scared to dance. This is amusing; it connotes that there's a 'wrong' way to dance, that there is some sort of way one can follow the impulses of their body to music that is inherently unacceptable in the eyes of society. Unfortunately this mortal fear doesn't just plague the Kardashians, but also targets some wedding guests, club goers, high school dance goers, audience members asked to participate and many more.  Sad! Sure, the US (and some of Europe, to an extent) doesn't have the cultural dance traditions and history of Africa, Asia and South America, but can we really not find pleasure in moving our bodies authentically, regardless of what it looks like? Where do the unfortunate roots of "step-touch to the beat with very little upper body involvement" trace back to... who was the jerk that declared that as the social dance movement aesthetic of the US? 

Food for thought.

Do me a favor, at least go have a moment of dance glory (in private, if you must) in my honor.

Source: https://medium.com/@kaholman/dancing-in-pu...
tags: awkward, ellen degeneres, scared, self conscious, traditions, culture, dance, true confession, kardashians
categories: Topics for Discussion, Bits of life
Thursday 05.05.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
Comments: 2
 

Losing Creativity

I was spending time with a dear friend last week and in the midst of our afternoon-long conversation she remarked "perhaps I'm just not creative anymore,"  in regards to career. (This friend, might I add, is a talented writer who has acted, directed, improvised, etc., I could sing praises of her creative self for days.)  This interaction made my brain respond by pulling in two separate directions: a triggered worry and reassurance. How fleeting is our creativity? Why must there be a sense of fear in regard to something that functions as a release? In contrast to my questions, I'm a firm believer that everyone is creative but recognize that it's a tool that requires utilization to access with ease. More on that later.

I'd be lying if I said I had never worried that my creativity would dry up, that one day I would wake up unable to produce an idea for something new to try, and the longer conversation between my friend and I certainly stirred that whispering voice in the back of my head. As an artist attached to a company with a regular performance schedule there's an additional sense of pressure that there always needs to be a next new idea. The truth is there doesn't always need to be an immediate next idea, that worry is entirely self-imposed, but I do feel it and the superficial need to keep the company relevant. Perhaps that's a ridiculous concept to acknowledge, constant production for the sake of production does seem to defeat the point of being an artist, but the point of a blog is to be candid for everyone's betterment and shared experience, right?

Why does worry surround art and creativity? Professional artists to creative hobbyists and all in between, everyone seems to be afflicted with at least a touch of stress, mainly when it comes to sharing one's art publicly. By worrying about how what we make is received I think that we are losing the point of making. Considering if masses will love or hate what we put into the world obscures the major fact that by putting something into the world we are contributing to society's culture - important! There is also no way to win that internal debate; if everything you make and share is 'good', your lack of lows diminishes the success of your highs (the idea of success alone merits its own post), in my own opinion. 

Worries aside, I think that any human being can practice creativity and even more that the regular practice of being creative stimulates naturally occurring creativity - a mutually beneficial cycle. Taking the pressure off making a product by, you know, removing the product leaves us simply with the worry-free act of making. The act of practicing creativity is not so much to be able to produce or not, but more so to refine one's craft and make new discoveries.  By doing, by practicing, both doing and practicing become such second nature that the creative person can narrow their focus when we finally return to that idea of making something. 

In order to be more proactive here are of my favorite exercises that are perfect for non-movers or movers, career artists or those who pursue creative endeavors recreationally - anyone who wants to ease access to regular creativity that's already lurking beneath the surface!

  • Authentic movement/improv exercises. A set amount of time or not, filmed or not filmed, every single day I like to very briefly let my body do what it pleases. No 'dance' required, unless my body feels like adhering to technique. 
  • Movement sketches. Observe something, find a way to pay quick/easy homage to it in movement. Last week it was mall-goers.
  • Regular sketches. Really, doodling. I do this in an attempt to become better at drawing people and movement (no signs of improvement yet, by the way) but also to practice the skill of finishing things as it's really hard for me to abandon a sketch.
  • Transcribing. Going into a coffee shop, riding the subway, sneakily eavesdropping on family and friends... the best justification for snooping on others. Write down all that you hear for a set period of time or for the duration of a conversation. I've found this provides an additional interesting exercise of taking apart and reassembling/generally tinkering with the structure of the original conversation.
  • Writing! The old standard. I wish I was better at doing this regularly, but when I remember I enjoy picking a number of pages or a number of minutes to write and just getting words on paper. I can't do this on a computer, and I often rip the paper from a notebook and recycle it when I'm done. Not because I care about the quality, I like the temporary-ness.

What do you do for a regular practice of creativity? 

In wrapping up this entry I think it's important to note that one doesn't have to be an artist or dabble in making art to be considered creative. Creative problem solving is something most individuals do regularly and is no less valid of a form of creativity than making art; thinking outside the box is a vital skill to practice. Also, before I finish I must thank the friend mentioned in the anecdote at the beginning of the post! She inspired me to craft this piece, and I'm notoriously terrible at starting, finishing and publishing my thoughts - practice in action. I like to think our conversation, in some small part, also reinvigorated her need for daily practice, and I'm really excited to see where it takes her. 

For those of you still unconvinced of your own creativity, pick up a copy of this brilliant (and yet remarkably common sense) read and get going!

tags: creativity, creation, making, art, worry, practice, process
categories: Topics for Discussion, Reflection & Exploration
Tuesday 05.03.16
Posted by Kimberleigh Holman
 
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